The Very Heart of God

When someone gets angry, and starts to act that anger out through yelling, screaming, or other violent means, what is the usual reaction?

Of course, the party being yelled at, usually yells back.

Anger, when not handled properly, usually begets anger, defensiveness, and other poor behaviors.

But, what about when someone tells you that you've hurt them. Or disappointed them. Or betrayed them. Oh. Oh my. That's different. That pierces the heart.

When I worked at New Dominion School, a school for boys who had gotten into some form of trouble at home or with the law, we dealt with 'feelings' - or emotions. Sure, there was a work component to the school - we chopped wood, built our own tents from raw materials, and cooked some of our own meals - and sure, there was a wilderness component to the school, as we lived outdoors 365 days a year; but what we really did through all of that was work through emotions.

There is a theory, a theory which went mainstream with the publication of the book "Real Boys," that says problem kids are problem kids because they can't handle their emotions. This issue presents itself mostly in boys because boys are unfortunately taught that displaying emotions is somehow 'unmanly' and unacceptable behavior for men.

And so we'd see new boys come to the school, and they'd come to us hard as nails. They were violent, verbally abusive, and did their best to act 'thuggish.' Gradually, we'd teach them to work through their emotions - their feelings. Maybe they had been abused, or neglected, or both. Maybe they had major issues in their home and family lives. Whatever it was they had feelings, and they were acting those feelings out through being violent, being criminal, and acting as if they were above their parents or above the law. When we taught them ways for them to express their feelings in positive ways - how to be angry, or sad, or happy in socially acceptable forms, they didn't need the bad attitude and bad actions.

One of the things they learned along the way, as they dropped the thug act, was that their actions gave other people feelings too. Especially thier family.

It was amazing to see these kids interact with their parent for the first time after being with us for several months. Whereas they really didn't care what their parents said or did before, now they would sit riveted listening to their parents talk about how hard it was to have them in the house. How they loved their child, but they couldn't stand his behaviors anymore. Often the parents would break down sobbing, obviously so in love with their child, but so broken bby what their child had become as a teenager.

Seeing how their actions effected their parents pierced these kids hearts for the first time. They, once hard thugs, would break down too. They would say how sorry they were for what they had done. For the first time in a long time they would tell their parents how much they loved them.

Over the next year or so this boy would grow in leaps and bounds into a boy who wanted to do well, and who wanted to make their parents proud. They knew how bad they had hurt their mom and dad, and they never wanted to do that again.

The emotions that love brings out are amazing - especially the love that parents have for their children. That unconditional love is so incredibly powerful. It can move mountains. Or at least move time hardened hearts.

In our Old Testament lesson from Isaiah this morning, we find raw emotion. What we actually find is a love song, written from a parent figure to His children.

My beloved had a vineyard
on a very fertile hill.
He dug it and cleared it of stones,
and planted it with choice vines;
he built a watchtower in the midst of it,
and hewed out a wine vat in it;
he expected it to yield grapes,
but it yielded wild grapes.

The beloved here is God. He gave his children a vineyard. He built it. Cultivated it. And he expected great things. He expected great grapes because he cared enough to plant the very best grape vines.

But, when the harvest came, the grapes were unusable. Someone had squandered all that the beloved Father had put into the vineyard.

And here is where the emotion is seen:

What more was there to do for my vineyard
that I have not done in it?

What more could he have done? How much more could he possibly have loved his children?

I watched a family one time who had a daughter that was so loved. She was showered with everything she ever wanted. Sohe was so close to her father. He did everything for her, and would have done anything else for her. And then one day, this teenage daughter turned out to be living a life that no one else knew about. The grief in the father was so strong: how much more could he possibly have loved his daughter? What else could he have done? How could she have done this - to him?

In Isaiah, we see the relationship between the people of God and their Heavenly Father.

Here in the beginning of the 5th chapter, we see a picture of God that isn't majestic, or all-powerful, or other-worldly. Here we see God's heart. We see his brokenness and pain. Here, in this passage we see into the character of God, and we feel his despair.

His people had abandoned him. They had been given so much, but they squandered it, worshipping other gods, living in reckless and immoral ways.

He had given them so much, what more was there for God to do?

Here, God is vulnerable.

The more you love, the more vulnerable you become to beng hurt.

And for a God who loves infinitely - boundlessly - there comes the potential for infinite and boundless pain.

We see something similar in the Gospel lesson. God, sends people to his vineyard who are killed by those he put in charge. So he sends others to the vineyard. They are also killed. And so in an act of ultimate vulnerability, he sends his own son, who is also killed.

There is a tendency to understand God in a very abstract way. To picture him as a old man, with a white beard, in a white robe, sitting on a throne aeons away. There is a tendency to think that the God in the Old Testament is a God of wrath and anger.

No, our God is a God of love. And we are people that fall down, and disappoint again and again.

And, as a God of love - as a God who is willing to be boundlessly vulnerable - he is willing to be boundlessly in love with us, and boundlessly patient with us.

God was hurt by his people in the days of Isaiah. He was hurt by his people in the days of Jesus. And, of course, we continue to disappoint, and hurt, and betray his vulnerable love.

But, his love will never cease. It will never come to an end.

And if for no other reason - if for no other thing in the universe - shouldn't we just love him back? Can't we try and make him proud? Can't we open ourselves to boundlessly love, since we are so boundlessly loved?

I pray so.